First Thoughts: Totally Accurate Battle Simulator (Early Access)

First Thoughts: Totally Accurate Battle Simulator (Early Access)

Ever wanted to witness the brutal outcome of a lone bard going up against a woolly mammoth? How about an army of farmers wielding pitchforks to defend against Valkyries?  Well, Swedish developers, Landfall Games have created a game for you… Totally Accurate Battle Simulators (TABS)! 

TABS, which was was released on April Fools day to pay homage to the Landfall tradition of April Fools jokes. is a bizarre but incredibly fun physics-based tactic game that is currently in Early Access on the Steam store. I think the trailer speaks volumes on just how fun this game can be.



In the campaign mode, you’re given limited credits to spend on your army and only select units are available on each map. The campaign currently offers around 50 levels that take you through various ages, starting with the Stone Age. The scenarios can be quite challenging as the AI team often seem to have the upper hand, so you’ve got to choose your unit wisely… but they’re still incredibly fun to watch play out, even if you never even stood a chance in the beginning (like some of my scenarios turned out).

At the time of writing, I’ve played about 6-7 hours of TABS, with most of that time being spent enjoying the Sandbox mode. This mode allows you to pick a map of your choosing and gives you unlimited credits to spend on not only your army but the other army too! This means you can decide who fights who and can make the odds as fair or unfair as you like.

The current factions available in the Early Access version are Medieval, Ancient, Viking, Farmers, and Stone Age. Landfall announced that when the game fully launches there will be 10 factions in total that will be playable, with the likes of Aztecs, Pirates, Modern, and the Desert Kingdom to name just a few. Each faction offers up around 7 or 8 different unit types that offer something unique to the battlefield. Whether it’s farmers and their wheelbarrows, Vikings throwing longboats, halflings leaping and latching on to their enemies, or Zeus himself throwing thunderbolts across the battlefield – it’s hard to be bored whilst you’re playing the game.

I’ve found myself just watching the carnage unfold in the game’s slo-mo mode, which just adds to the hilarity of the battle scenarios. I’ve taken screenshot after screenshot of units flailing around in the most bizarre positions and recorded so many clips to share mostly on Twitter. I would definitely recommend this game to those of you who stream. Both you and your viewers will get a hell of a laugh from the game and it’s ragdoll mechanics.

I can guarantee you’ll be recording endless clips of your battles and making GIFs of them.



The game’s minimal design plays in its favour and adds to the general hilarity that occurs when things get nuts. The googly eyes are a nice touch and go hand in hand with the general silliness of the game.

As far as Early Access versions go, TABS offers up a hell of a lot to get you excited for its eventual full release. Of course, it isn’t perfect and I’ve discovered a few bugs along the way, but Landfall is community driven and they continue to make improvements and fix bugs with each update they release. The simplicity and beauty of TABS would transfer really well on to mobile devices, and it’s definitely something I’d download to kill some time on my phone. Here’s to hoping Landfall are eyeing a mobile launch in the game’s future!

As the game is still in Early Access I will hold off on a star rating until its full launch later this year, but if it wasn’t already obvious, I can’t recommend TABS enough. It’s the perfect time killer and can offer up a good for a laugh if you’re in need of one.



Thank you to Landfall for sending me a code to review the game for PLAY – and we will be reviewing the full game once it is released! 

Developer: Landfall Games
Early Access: 1st April 2019
Steam Store


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